Discordia Rules OK In Post-Literate USA

It's just endlessly entertaining, the way people in this country have  COMPLETELY LOST THEIR GRIP on the meaning of what they are saying, because they HEARD it once, GUESSED at the meaning of it, not to mention the SPELLING, and never had the chance to clarify it in their minds because they never READ it anywhere in their lives. The inevitable result:  COMEDY GOLD.  

If you belong to the post-literate ORAL SOCIETY in America, you might be heard to say, or seen to post on the Net...

"Is this true, or is it an old wise tail?"

Before Discordia came to rule the USA, this speaker would have known s/he was talking about old wives' tales.  S/he would have understood further that old husbands help perpetuate such tales...

...But I digress.  Such a person might also be heard to say, or seen to tweet, "We're under the throws of a winter storm," when s/he really means "We're in the throes of a winter storm."

Or "I just play it one ear at a time.  I just play it ear by ear."

Or "I'm having a nervous breakthrough!!!"  (This probably also qualifies as a class-A Freudian slip.)

Or -- my all-time favorite -- "This shit hits me like a fan!"

(and you know that sucker really hits hard!)

Because of this effect, very day is a A STRAIGHT-FACE CHALLENGE for erudite moi, and I'm having the time of my life writing all of it down in a notebook.  When even English professors and wealthy stockbrokers are making comments like this at the dinner table or on the Net, well, it makes us look like a bunch of refugees from a Walt Kelly cartoon strip.  Pick up a copy of I Go Pogo and see if I'm not right.