Saturday, November 24, 2007

Yes, It's Use Even If Seal Is Broken Day!!!

IS THERE ANY DAY MORE LIBERATING THAN THIS ONE? America has cowered in a safety-sealed world ever since the mid-Eighties, when 7 people in the Chicago area were poisoned by cyanide-laced Extra-Strength Tylenol. I feel for their families, I do, but for Pete's sake, from that day to this I have not been able to buy ANYTHING without a safety seal. Peanut butter. Those tablets you feed into the garbage disposal. Vitamins. Bottled water. Fried chicken. Drain cleaner.
Normally it would be beyond the scope of this blog, if not a violation of its mission statment, to plead for sanity. But I loathe living in a country where the children are not allowed to watch TV without a helmet. I am going to clobber the next person who says "Have a safe holiday." Do people expect me to juggle live rattlesnakes just because it's Thanksgiving?
At some point we need to finally declare that the BS is getting too deep, instead of simply reaching for the hip-waders.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Chaos Never Dies Day Has Come And Gone!!!

I have no idea where a person goes to get a new national holiday set up, but somebody went there and signed up Nov. 9th as Chaos Never Dies Day. And I didn't even hear about it until just now. Dang!

Of course, if Chaos never dies, why celebrate it on just one day of the year, huh? Huh?
I need to add here, because of its deep personal meaningfulness to moi, that I know an inordinate number of people born on Nov. 9th, and two of the most important ones have been royal pains in the adze. You know who you are.