THE PRANKSTER AND THE CONSPIRACY

Just as I was really starting to wonder, I mean seriously wonder, about Kerry Thornley, Bull Goose of Limbo and Keeper of the Sacred Chao, THIS BOOK PRESENTED ITSELF TO ME so I could read all about him. And I did.

WHAT A MAGICAL MYSTERY TOUR THIS GUY'S LIFE WAS. And I have to tell you that a lot of it was NO FUN AT ALL, so you can keep your incense and peppermints and marmalade skies, OK? But he never stopped looking for the truth of WHATEVER IT WAS that made his life go the way it did. I have no clue whether he found what he was looking for, or, hell, whether he even knew what he was looking for. The book never says. Reading about Thornley's life allows us to taste both the UNTOLD GLORIES and the GRITTY UNDERSIDE of nothing, anywhere, being true.

IT'S FUNNY HOW THINGS HAPPEN, ISN'T IT?

Lords Of Chaos

So get a load of the quote I found in this book about the Black Metal movement, penned by Didrik Soderlind and Michael Moynihan, and published by Feral House in 1998:

"At first, I want to explain the deeper meaning of the term Absurd, as we understand it: absurdus = diabolus, i.e. a "maelstrom" that's sending out ravaging, entangling, wrecking, decaying influence; an expression of Chaos. Being affiliated with this great-power [sic], enables one to understand the need for Chaos as a condition of any Order (and Order can likewise be brought back to its primary matter, Chaos)."

-- Hendrik Mobus, a member of a German Black Metal band called Absurd

OK, now, WHAT DO WE MAKE OF THIS? At first blush it looks as if Hendrik had actually THOUGHT ABOUT THIS to some extent. As far as his thesis statement goes, it's ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. He and his two buds named their band Absurd because what they feel most people would find absurd is what they consider normal. Or maybe I should say, they'd like that to be normal, but they know it isn't, at least in the mass consciousness.

But notice also that the guy puts an equals sign between Chaos and destruction, and come on, THAT'S NOT HAPPENING. It takes a person overly focused on Order to do that, and hey, I thought you guys found Chaos NORMAL, huh?

I also want you to know that at the time he disclosed his thoughts to the authors of this book, Hendrik and the other guys in the band were behind bars for strangling a kid who'd been gossiping about them. This is right where the ground starts to slope away, as far as I'm concerned. Shenanigans like those mark you as dead normal, Joe Average, Homo sap. In fact, it makes you look a little sub-normal, like the mean girls from Middle School ganging up on a weaker kid, not even able to face him down one on one, without a weapon.

This other kid, Sandro Beyer, shook you up a little. You dusted him. And why would you do that? TO RESTORE YOUR PITIFUL SENSE OF ORDER. I think this shows that you fundamentally DON'T GET IT.

I'm really kind of encouraged that someone, somewhere is putting even this much thought into the nature of Order and Chaos and the way they blend together at odd moments, but ultimately I have to give it a hearty "sheesh."

(I'd like to apologize to both Hendrik and Didrik for not knowing how to put all the right crosshatches and umlauts in their names. You're lucky I can type this at all; I'm turning into a catfish, for crissakes.)